Kind of mean, but kind of awesome in its meanness

I was working through the solicitations for the monthly orders, and I was reading the GI Joe stuff in the IDW section. This last note for G.I Joe Movie: Snake Eyes #1 caught my attention:

"And check out this cover-it's got red foil! Totally awesome!"

It's not just me, right? That kind of draws attention to itself, but in a snide kind of way right?

"Look at this you little fanboy! It's a total throwback to the '90's, you insipid little monkey! Friggin' rad, huh! HUH?!?!"

Maybe I just read too much into these things....

But honestly, as much as I think it sounds a little condescending, I kind of want to give credit for whoever wrote that. Mostly because that's exactly how I feel when I see most variant cover solicitations.

It's written by Ray Park, so you know.......yay?

Sorry, I don't mean to come off snide myself, I enjoy GI Joe & Snake Eyes a lot actually. I just had to snicker when I read that line in the catalog.

Comic Speculators

When I was younger, I liked the idea that the comics I bought at the time could potentially be worth something down the road. I was always excited when I could afford some sort of 1st appearance of a character, and always had a list of books to look for. Keep in mind, affordable for me as a 11 year old was like the first appearance of Hydro-Man or Cloak & Dagger.
And man. I loved the hell out of that Hydro-Man issue. I would show it to my mom or brother and go "Look! 1st appearance of Hydro-Man!" and they would go "......who?" And I would reply "HE'S TOTALLY MADE OUT OF WATER. HE'S LIKE SANDMAN. BUT NOT. AND WHEN THEY RUN INTO EACH OTHER THEY MAKE THIS MUD MONSTER THING."

......sad, really.

As time went on, I could afford stuff like the first Alpha Flight or Black Cat, or maybe something like a beat up copy with the first Ocean Master. The thing is, while I always thought, "Wow, these things are worth money.", my mind never made the next leap which was "And then I will sell it." Because I loved just collecting and reading the damn things. I think a lot of us go on to value the read more as we become adults, as well as the collecting aspect.

In general I think most people would like their copies to be nice copies. If your book has a big tear or printing error, you usually will switch it out. On the flip side of that, many readers just want the content and don't care at all. Personally I'm in the middle, because while I would like to buy a nice copy, I'll take what I can take. If I damage the book at home, oh well, sucks but I read it and I don't really need to waste more money.

Then you have the pure speculators.

The reason I bring this up is that I had this one customer who really really really embodies the worse aspects of this hobby. It wasn't because of just one thing he did either, but of a super combo attack that was just......utterly breathtaking in it's dickery, is the only way I can describe it.

We start off with the detail that during his last visit, he was in a rush and asked my female coworker to pull down a variant copy of Captain America Reborn #1 from one of our walls. The specific request was "Only put it in my box if it's in perfect shape." The guy left right after asking that, so he wanted us to hold it for him. Ok, no biggie. My coworker pulls it down, and noticed it had the tiniest of tiny tiny spine dents. Tiny. I told her to go ahead and put it in his subscription box so he can judge by himself.

So the dude comes in when it's just me. I grab his books, and he pulls that one out. Angrily, he proclaims, "I told her to ONLY pull this if it was perfect." Tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny dent. Ever so tiny. I just tell him, well it's alright you don't have to buy it. We just weren't sure because everyone has a different concept on grading. To which he replied, "The guys at CGC would give me so much crap for sending this in!"

That's a superstrike right there for me, because I'm not a big fan of slabbing books. For those unfamilair, you can send your comics to a grading company that appraises your comic, seals it in an airtight container, and sends it back to you with a grade on a scale of 1-10. We've done it as a store before, I completely understand the benefits for online purchasing, it's all cool if you want to for your own collection. I will never slab a book though, and I'm not crazy when people brag about that crap. Simply because CGC slabbing is kind of the opposite of the entire damn point of enjoying a comic.

So, we move on from this and I take the book back. The next push in the combo of stupidity was when he complained about how my coworker 'handled' the comics. Apparently sometimes she grabs the pile by the spine. Seriously. Look, if a worker just grabbed a pile and tossed it hard at the counter then I would be pissed. My coworker does not do that. I mean I grab piles by the spine. I grab them by two hands. I grab them by the top. I friggin' grab them however the hell I grab them because I am just getting your comics. It's not an art form. There is no definitive way of grabbing a comic other than not stabbing the things and spitting on it as you hand it to the customer.

After narrowly escaping my desire to bash his head in with a random Batman statue, he then felt the need to brag more about what he just sent to be graded and slabbed. This is what I would refer to as the air juggling session of the dickery combo, right before continuing with the actual attack.

As the customer was looking through his pile, he complained that he got number 3 of an issue and not numbers 1 & 2. Then he found a number 2 in his pile and complained he didn't get a number 1. Keep in mind he was very agitated and really wanted to express his concern over the missing issues. Then he complained he was missing an issue of something else, but got the issue after it. Then he found the copy of #1 of the three issue series on the bottom of his pile. Then he found the other book he was complaining about under that. They were there in his hands the entire time.

So the lesson is: STFU AND LOOK THROUGH YOUR ENTIRE DAMN PILE BEFORE YOU EVEN SAY A SINGLE WORD TO YOUR CLERK.

Then I think the finisher move was him trying to pass on something he preordered, and then pouting about it whe I said no. It was that or his complaining that comics aren't well produced enough because it's hard to find 9.8 or above copies to send in to be graded and slabbed.

Either way, you should all be very glad I never finished my doomsday device because you would all be crispy fried at this point. Or frozen in a glacier, I never decided just what kind of device it was going to be.

Here's the really sad thing. This customer is just one of many who act the same way. Many many many. There's a fine line between collector and speculator. I have plenty of customers who are concerned about condition in their vintage books, but of those customers I know that they actually do open and read those books. They enjoy, and they collect. People who just collect for the sake of monetary gain are doing it wrong. In general, customers of this type seem to all have that hint of greediness behind their character. It's very interesting to actually see it in action and how it shapes their interactions and their attitude about the industry. And by interesting, I mean soul crushingly painful.

That was kind of a long rant there, sorry. I'll try to post something more positive soon.

Comic Shop Etiquette War Journal: Say Hello for God's Sake

Let's see here. I was wondering if I should do these in some sort of order, but I decided it might work just fine if I do what comes to mind. We'll see if it turns into a train wreck or not.

One of the most common complaints I read/hear about is that when a customer enters a comic shop they are not always greeted with a friendly welcome. Sometimes they are ignored, grunted at, or watched like a hawk. So, lets hit the store staff first.

Retailers:

-It's understandable that maybe you aren't having a good day. Well, here's some more bad news; suck that shit up crybaby. You work retail even if this is a different type of retail. Regardless of if your a clerk, manager, or owner you better greet those god damned customers.

First of all, it's just the polite thing to do as a human being. Second, if you want your business to actually have business you better get used to being socially acceptable to some degree. Again, I know sometimes it's tough when your tired or have had a bad start. Sometimes I go into work low on gas or with the yearning to crush someones skull with a rock. The moment someone walks in though, I say hi. I don't make a big hoopla about it and I don't make it sound like I'm the happiest guy on the planet. You say 'Hi, how ya doing?' or 'How's the day treating you?'. When they ask you back, you don't have to lie but you shouldn't make a spectacle of yourself. There is no need to tell them why you got a problem, that's not why they came in. If you know the customer well, you can get into it maybe. The best thing to do though, if you can't honestly answer back positively is to answer back with a joke or just say 'Hangin' in there'.

People like it if your genuine. In fact, people can relate if you're just the guy doing his job and helping them out. You don't need to be a glorified car salesman and be their buddy. Just don't treat them like they are a burden the moment they walk in. Even the people you hate, you should just be polite and keep your distance if you know they will set you off. I do my best loathing from a distance.

-Now here's a tricky one. I've often heard the complaint of the clerk watching the customer like a hawk from the moment the customer enters the store. Now, ideally the clerk isn't a douche and isn't leering at you because you're a woman. I've worked with people who wouldn't leave women alone and well, the experience was soul sucking. That's behavior that needs to be weeded out as fast as possible.

The one thing I don't think customers take into account though is the very very very high shoplifting rate comic stores have to deal with. Some stores can't afford cameras or any type of real security besides an alarm, so it's up to us to watch the store. As sad as it sounds, unless we really know and trust a customer, almost everyone can be suspect. It's pretty much impossible to tell who is going to rip you off. So customers, if that sounds paranoid at all, well you just have to suck it up as well cause it's the truth. Parents will use their children to steal. That is the world we have to live in.

A few months back, another comic store called and warned us of a shoplifter who they were able to identify as stealing numerous hard covers. The general description was incredibly vague, an average height and build Caucasian male. Only one thing really stood out and that was the detail that the man had a limp. The very next day, a very generic Caucasian male walks in with a limp. I felt like a douche, but I watched him the entire time. Was he the guy? I'll never really know. Haven't seen him in a while, maybe I made him feel uncomfortable. Sucks either way.

Customers:

-Hopefully, you enter a store and the clerk greets you. You know what you should do? GREET THEM BACK. Today alone I was ignored by 3 customers both on their way in and on their way out. Everyday it happens so it can be a little disheartening.

-YOU HAD BETTER TAKE OFF YOUR DAMN EARPHONES OR TURN THE MUSIC OFF. I swear, that is one of the rudest things and instantly earns you my hatred. You may listen to your music after you have said hello and acknowledged you have entered into a place of business and the nice clerk has said hello. Just be sure you can hear them say hello.

-Do not enter the store yelling. Just, please. Please don't.

-Do not enter the store while very audibly judging us. Please. It's kind of mean :(

-Store staff does zoom in on certain things when looking out for shoplifters. These include:

A) You are wearing a hoody 3 times your size

B) Your outfit is practically made of pockets

C) You do not instantly volunteer to leave your backpack at the door

D) You won't stop twitching and your hands are covered in dried blood (I am not making that up).

E) You ask us what is the most expensive item in the store

F) 3 or more teenagers enter the store at once. Seriously, I don't want to sound like an old fart but that shit just makes us nervous.

G) You enter a circle pattern across the entire store, arcing more than twice with yet nothing in your hands to buy. One loop means you found nothing. Two loops means your maybe killing time. Three loops is trouble.

-That's pretty much it, you really don't have much etiquette to worry about on this one.

A lot of this stuff seems common sense, on both sides. Sadly, not the case. If I do seem like I'm just stating the obvious, please let me know so I can refine my focus a bit though. I don't want to just pointlessly rant.....er, no wait, that's the entire point of this blog. Never mind.

Thinking is hard

Blarg, I am pretty tired.

Something that I have been planning on doing soon is compiling an etiquette/survival guide for comic book stores. Now I'm fairly sure this has been done before and by finer people than myself, which is actually part of the point that I will get to later. Most of the time when I read anything about 'how to run a friendly comic book store', it usually makes a lot of sense but focuses on a lot of things that to me are a given. For example, don't be a douchbag. Make it a friendly and inviting environment for kids and women. Clean the damn place. Y'know, basic stuff.

What I feel tends to be missing is a sense of actually understanding what kind of work goes behind the scenes in this type of industry and the people who are on the front lines. I'm kind of hoping of going into a lot of different topics and addressing them from both a retailer's point of view as well as a customer's. For example, I may choose something as store presentation and examine what a customer might perceive as a good store and then examine what priorities a retailer might have versus the actual ability of that retailer to achieve them (via funding, time, management, available workforce).

Now anyone who has read this blog for any amount of time might be familiar with a few details about myself; I get pissed off a lot. I'm kind of cranky. I get touchy about the way people judge comic book stores without allowing for a discussion. My life goal is to destroy this planet. I like monkeys.

Those fundamental aspects of my personality might help you to understand the following basic stance I have about how a retailer should operate in this industry:

As a retailer, you should do everything in your ability to create a healthy, polite, and inviting atmosphere so as to promote this medium and your own business for the sake of its survival. HOWEVER. You need to keep in mind that an alarmingly large portion of your customer base are A) ignorant of how your business and this industry work, and are generally B) greedy, rude, selfish, socially maladjusted dumb asses who need to be savagely beaten from time to time.

Unfortunately, you are not legally allowed to administer said beatings. So you have to realize one all important facts otherwise you will have a mental breakdown at some point. You can't make everyone happy all of the time, so screw it. Let's go get a drink.

Some stores have the funds to look awesome and are cool with awesome customer service. Some have the funds to look cool and are operated by complete assholes. Some are huge messes run by nice guys. Some are huge messes run by creepy hippies. I work in a store that while not really pretty it is not a huge honkin' mess either. We have to balance the aesthetics with the quality of service and find a nice middle ground where you don't really mind the concrete floor and just care about dealing with friendly people who will help you find some comics.

We are by no stretch perfect, but then neither are you.

That's pretty much all the context you'll really need for the future. Let me give you two short examples just to illustrate the way I'll be doing this guide thingy.

Example one: Mistakes are made often times by both parties.

A) We accidentally gave you Angel instead of Amazing Spider-Man in your subscription one week since they are right next to each other in the pull boxes. We switch it out, or worse case scenario is we are out of Amazing Spider-Man and we have to reorder it for you. Sorry about that, we screwed up.

B) This customer keeps telling me he's been missing books every single visit for the better part of 2 months . He gets a number of titles that always have variant covers or reprints, as well as any and all Ender's Game titles which can be a bit confusing at times. Each time I help him find what he thinks is missing, but he seems kind of agitated. After a month though I have to question the situation because seriously, we can not suck at this that bad. Sure there is human error but for this level of mistakes we would really have to suck.

So he comes in again, and says 'can I tell you something?' I go sure. He proceeds to tell me that he just worked through his comic boxes after moving for the past few months, and he has duplicates of every single book he complained about. We filled the subscription right, but because he wasn't checking the variants and actual issue numbers (because seriously, every cover to Ender's Game looks the same) he assumed the worst and doubled up.

Most guides are pretty much one sided and just tell a retailer how they should behave. They never seem to actually prep you for the sheer stupidity you have waiting ahead of you. So what I was hoping for in the longterm was that I can touch on a great number of subjects and try to give both examples of how not to be a douchbag as a retailer and as a customer.

Thoughts?

No' the wee dug! No!

Sorry, that was just one of the better moments from comics this week and I couldn't think of a better subject title.

Anywho, just mentally recovering at the moment. Finished the bulk of data entry on a new point-of-sale system, which pretty much required transfering about 400 subscriptions one by one and title by title. Still a little while before the complete launch, but it has taken a major leap forward. After clocking in a crapload of overtime to do that I wasn't much for updates, so I'm just wondering what I can cram in here.

A question for anyone who has been reading the Green Lantern titles: How are you enjoying it? Or are you tired of the build up and Blackest Night hullabaloo?

I ask because while our sales have been storng and growing, a few customers have dropped the titles because they A) Don't feel it is going anywhere worthwhile, B) Has been taking too long for the build up, and C) Feel it requires them to read too many different titles.

I'm pretty much the opposite on all of the above myself. Especially the too many different titles part, since it's only two different books. I actually prefer Corp over GL because Tomasi is doing a fantastic job of balancing numerous sub-plots with a huge cast. Regardless, sure, when Blackest Night actually starts there are a few minis besides the main title but I'm a little more confident they won't be as mandatory as say Superman Beyond was to Final Crisis.

I actually really enjoyed the Agent Orange stuff as well, so all in all I'm having trouble really understanding some of the complaints.

Let's see, what else is interesting:

-So, on Saturdays we close at 8pm. This past Sat a few minutes after 8 and before we could get the doors closed, a group of customers walk in. I politly let them know that we will be closing in a few minutes. So they look around the center of the store for a sec, turn around and head out, and one of them snidly says "That's customer service for you."

I feel that I would have been found innocent if I actually had bashed his skull in, but I was tired and just let it go. That guy is probably gunna be the one dude who goes online and starts to bitch about us though >_<

-No one seems to be buying the extra copies of Captain America: Reborn that I ordered so far

-_-

We upped the order an extra 60 over normal Cap numbers as well, so yay.

Also, didn't Captain Sisko suffer basically the same type of problem once that Steve Rogers seems to be experiencing here?

-Damn it's a good week for apes

That's about all I have for now.

Oh, and this:

Oh, c'mon already

There are 10 different Marvel books arriving tomorrow that have the word 'Dark' in their title somewhere -_-

DARK AVENGERS #6 $3.99
DARK AVENGERS UNCANNY X-MEN UTOPIA #1 DAX $3.99
DARK REIGN ACCEPT CHANGE TP $24.99
DARK REIGN ELEKTRA #4 (OF 5) DKR $3.99
DARK REIGN HOOD #2 (OF 5) DKR $3.99
DARK REIGN LETHAL LEGION #1 (OF 3) DKR $3.99
DARK REIGN SINISTER SPIDER-MAN #1 (OF 4) $3.99
DARK REIGN SINISTER SPIDER-MAN #1 (OF 4) DKR $3.99
DARK REIGN ZODIAC #1 (OF 3) DKR $3.99
DARK WOLVERINE #75 DKR $3.99

One is a trade, so whatever. Nine titles and all at $3.99. I'm used to being hit over the head with the event crap from DC & Marvel, but seriously. They've managed to go past event overkill since the actual Dark Reign isn't an event but just the umbrella theme for the season. We have people going for it, so the sales will point them towards believing they can get away with it. Is this just a temporary sales bubble, or will this actually generate a whole new level of interest but throw us into another Dark Age of the comics industry?

Does Wolverine really have to be any more grim and gritty?

This sounds about right....
"If the Golden Age and the Silver Age were the childhood of Super Heroes, and the Bronze Age and the Dark Age were their adolescence, the Modern Age is surely the college years: all the work gets turned in late, people come up to you with crazy-awesome ideas all the time (most of which don't really pan out), and there's still some of that adolescent attitude left, but it's fading into adulthood, and you start to realize how much you miss the simple pleasures of your childhood."

via TV Tropes

How to price things so they will actually sell.

Please keep in mind this is just my opinion as someone who is actually trying to, y'know, sell this crap. Then again, what the hell do I know, right?

Here are examples from this week on some bad packages, along with some great packages so we can get a good comparison going.

FAIL:

X-Infernus HC

Why fail?:

1. As a minor X-Men mini, most people would prefer to save their money and buy a soft cover.

2. Why does this deserve to be over sized?

3. Ok, 4 issues at $3.99, plus the one shot thingy, and the saga pages (which who the hell needs anyway.....). My math still says this isn't worth more than $19.99. And it is priced at.....$29.99.

WIN:Sleeper Season 1

Why win?:

1) Out of print for the past year, Brubaker's work (notably his work with Sean Phillips) is in high demand. Bringing this back to print in a condensed format is smart.

2) 12 entire issues for $24.99. Yes, that is a fantastically good deal. If I remember correctly, the original cover price was $2.95, so the actual value of the trade is at least $35.

FAIL:Power Pack Classic Vol 1

Why Fail?

1) Classic? Really? You guys throw that word around way too much. Classic Champions? Really? If you crack out Classic Secret Defenders, we are going to have a long talk I think.

2) $29.99!!! For 10 issues! You shouldn't have to pay $10 for 10 issues guys, c'mon.

3) These need to be priced down and reformatted for the appropriate audience: kids. That should be your target group, dumbasses. No parent wants to drop that much money in one shot for a comic that their kid will most likely destroy. There is no reason this should be glossy and there is no reason to market this as some sort of fancy complete edition.

WIN:Nexus As It Happened TP

Why win?

1) Nice reprinting of the original stuff, smaller format so not everyone will like that but a handy introduction package.

2) $9.99 price tag, Really, that's a lot of good reading for your buck.

FAIL:

The Irredeemable Ant-Man TP

Why fail?

1) The package is well put together, but considering this is one of Kirkman's slower sellers in comparison to say Walking Dead and Invincible you would want to put it out at a reasonable price, not say

2) $34.99 >:( Yes, this is 12 issues, so that's about the right price technically. Look over at Sleeper though, which also has glossy paper. I think you can probably put together an actual set of the single issues of this series for less money simply because you'll find them in bargain bins. Sure the same could possibly be said about Sleeper, but the fact that the very thought jumped to my mind as someone who wants both volumes should be an indication of the possible market strength of the book.

WIN:Hitman Vol 1

Why win?

1) Out of print for a while and written by Garth Ennis, this is basically guaranteed to sell

2) Reprints the first appearance in the Demon Annual, a story from Batman Chronicles, and the first three issues of his own series, the price tag on this sucker is $14.99 which is not a bad deal at all.

This was just one week's worth of books, and DC does pull plenty of shenanigans. I try to look at the trades and their prices every week as they come in and the general trends sink in pretty hard and pretty fast.

1) Unnecessary hardcovers in a confusing assortment of formats, with DC publishing soft covers way slower than Marvel therefore sucking out as much cash as possible from less patient readers.

2) Marvel will gouge you silly till they can use your blood as a cheap alternative to ink.

3) DC does the same as well, with HCs that reprint only four or five issues for $19.99-$24.99. However, they seem to do it a little less frequently and the gouging doesn't seem to go as deep.

4) It would seem to me that Marvel is banking on these larger packages to sell at Barnes & Noble and other large bookstore outlets. I would assume the logic behind it is that most shoppers who don't go to comic book stores don't know any better to compare prices with the original source material and are used to most books costing $24.99-$29.99 anyway.

5) Dark Horse prices are generally agreeable, their books shipped with more care, and if there is a softcover or a hardcover choice, they only tend to make you wait a month at the most for a softcover. Sometimes they ship both at the same time.

I mostly bring this up because there are a lot of things that I think we could actually sell if they were just packaged appropriately. I also realize there may be a number of factors I haven't thought of and perhaps certain things have to be packaged the way they are. It would be nice if there was more interaction with retailers on this front.

Thoughts?

aaaaaaand nobody gave a damn

So yeah, talked to one of the guys who worked the store yesterday. 2 phone calls of interest, and no real extra traffic whatsoever besides a few subscription customers coming to pick up the book so the Internet wouldn't spoil it for them.

Granted, it's not like I ordered a crapload to support it or anything.

I do like the title of this article, looking back on it. Retailers Unhappy With Cap #600?

The question mark makes me kinda laugh, is all.

Fwugga

Bleh, been a bit since I posted. Just too dang busy and tired lately =/

Have a new point of sale system we've been working with and the data entry is evil, plus just normal monthly Diamond orders and a few other things. Ideally I should have some more time to catch up and actually get crap posted all up in here.

A few things of interest:

-This whole Captain America #600 thing. Now, I will start with saying that I probably should have increased our orders on the issue much more than I did. However, between the economy sucking ass and the general fall of sales in Marvel books for our store I decided to be conservative in my orders. Also, because there is an entire series called Reborn written by Ed Brubaker, we pretty much figured that the actual return would not be in #600 and that issue #600 would essentially just be a double sized hooplah. A well written hooplah, but just a hooplah. Not a 'ZOMG-WE-SHOULD-ORDER-200-COPIES' kinda deal.

So, my order increases for #600 after the announcement of the media involvement are on back order, meaning we won't get any of them on the actual release date. Meaning that whatever I get on the Monday shipment (the day the larger media will break the news of whatever the hell is happening in the issue), will be just enough for the subscription customers and very few off the street people. That means there is virtually no real benefit for paying the extra shipping to have the books delivered on Monday, other than just to say we did it.

So, once again, I have to ask the obvious question: Why will the assholes at Marvel not just over ship copies and charge for whatever isn't returned? They do it. They did it for Dr. Doom & The Masters of Evil. WHY NOT DO IT WITH SOMETHING YOU KNOW WILL SELL OUT.

I know the actual answer, it just contains too many swear words for me to actually print.

-C'mon, really? Did you have to print X-Men 2099 in a collection? And charge $29.99? When Marvel decides it's time to publish Ravage 2099, that's it. I'm pretty much done with ever trying to understand comic book marketing departments.

-On the plus side, Marvel did release this over the past week:

And it is just as awesome as that cover leads you to believe.

That's pretty much all I got in me for the time being. I'll try to zip online again soon to write some more hopefully.

For now, watch this:

We meet again, my arch-est of enemies

So you know that dude I hate? Well, he's actually small game compared to my true archenemy. I say archenemy as no exaggeration because every time I have to deal with him I pretty much feel like this:

pic via ComicBookDB

I lose a small part of my ragged and shriveled soul every time I meet this guy. In fact, I'm fairly sure my soul has been replaced with nothing but pure rage and contempt just because of this dude. I hate him more than that dude I hate. Just.......just check this shit out. This is in no order, it's just the shit he pulls. Like every time. For ever. And ever.

-Kicked up a major fuss over .05 cents worth difference in the total the register gave for his purchase vs the total he came out to in the calculator. Yes, he carries a little pocket calculator and spends like 30 minutes every purchase figuring out his costs. If your budget is this tight, you should probably just stop with the comics.

And I mean a fuss. Like he would not let it go, so to shut him up I just tossed him the change from my pocket. It was that day I sadly discovered that the mental daggers I was throwing at him with my mind were not lethal at all.

-Has asked us numerous times to buy him something from another store and then resell it to him with his subscription discount because we sold out of it. For reals.

-Told me he didn't want to order a $50 book, but he wanted to see it so he asked if I could order it. It was a random piece of crap, so I said no we need a pre-order for it because I have no confidence it would sell. So he then asked me to search through all the other stores in the city so he could go and look at it. My hatred aura makes babies cry within a one block radius wherever I go.

-Constantly filled his order forms in the following way: Items marked in pen meant he for sure probably wanted them kinda, while items marked in pencil meant he sorta kinda wanted them but not enough for a 100% commitment, more like a 60% commitment. That shit.....that shit does not fly with orders. And it would always be like a $50+ box of Xena collecting cards or something like that he scribbled down in pencil. Not to come down on Xena, but seriously I am not gonna order those cards without a commitment.

-Will ask my female co-worker a question, then completely disregard her answer and ask a male worker the same question.

-Will come in and look at the books in his subscription constantly, but never buy them until some point at the end of the month. So he always has us pull them out so he can inspect them. Just....just come in once a month. Please.

-He came in one time and hung out for like an hour like he usually does, and I helped him on and off. I was sick that day and feeling kinda nauseous and bleh, so after he left I excused myself to the restroom cause I felt horrible. I hear his voice and he has come back in and asked someone where I went, they say I went to the restroom, and he says he will wait. I would have broken through the wall into the next store over if I only had a hammer. And he totally waited me out too, the bastard. I open the door and he is like staring at the restroom door. And his question? Do I think if some random comic will be worth collecting, cause y'know, all this shit we buy today will pay out millions of dollars in the future. skfsgzghf;lv;ls

-Expects any comics he might sell (to us, a retailer) full guide price if not more.

-I am 96% sure he never ever ever ever ever reads his comics.

-Oh and he will interrupt other customers.

Now take all of those, and repeat. Constantly. Every week or so. I am still leaving stuff out.

When I finally enact my terrible doom plans on this planet, you'll know who to blame.

Ruh-oh

So, 6 customers over the past four days have sent me their new subscription lists, and on every email they all say the same thing: have to trim off the bulk of Marvel, $3.99 is too expensive.

I've already had plenty of customers do this, but not this many all at once. It was like pow pow pow all in direct reply to my last email newsletter, and the customers are all across the spectrum of jobs so it wasn't like they were all Microsoft or anything.

So, Marvel. I refuse to believe you are all friggin' idiots. You all have to read the numbers. Marketing has to exist for some reason. What's up? What's the grand master plan?

Bah.

How to murder an industry

I've already kinda ranted about this before, but it seems like something worth ranting about considering it's becoming more relevant every week.

Ringing up customers the past few days and ouch, those $3.99 books from Marvel are just killing everybody. If you were a more of a DC person, you only had one to deal with one FC: Legion of 3 Worlds. Hell, you even got a $1.00 book. For Marvel people though, only 6 or 7 of the normal titles were $2.99 while there were over 14 at $3.99.

So now more than ever, I feel like there are some oddball marketing shenanigans going on. Seriously, it's not that complicated. Marvel, you are trying to hook people into new titles such as:
Agents of Atlas
Secret Warriors
Black Panther relaunch
X-Men Bishop: A Random Waste of Your Time and Dollar
and whatever the hell else came out this week.

But you are charging people up the wazoo.

Now look over at DC. The Mighty, By Tomasi and Snejbjerg, is a brand new title. And look it's just $2.99! Sadly, now these days I have to consider $2.99 as 'just $2.99!'. But you get the idea. Any friggin idiot can get the idea. I sold out of Secret Warriors and Agents of Atlas, but honestly we didn't order super high shelf numbers because we have no confidence these days without strong pre-orders. I ordered relatively high for the Mighty considering it has no relation to any DC mainstream project, but I did that because I like Tomasi and actually did have confidence I could push them. Plus, $2.99. If I lose out, it's not as hard as say any of the $3.99 books we have to swallow.

So the question is if I can see this, and really, I'm not all too bright sometimes, why is it still happening? Is there some additional cost to the publisher I am missing? Is someone just not paying attention? Is it just greed?

The talks I've had with other employees keep on leading me to the idea that maybe, just maybe, Marvel is purposely trying to murder the single issue market. And I think I can understand the why. Many people are saying that online comics will be the future, and if it's popular enough it will just be printed as a TPB. That way, they can get into the bookstores as well. And if you look at the pricing practices going on in HCs and TPBs, I can understand that could be highly lucrative. Seriously, some of these Marvel HCs coming out are $25 for 4 friggin issues. DC is also guilty of this. Only people who buy just from bookstores might make the mistake of thinking that's a good deal. If they don't know the industry to any degree and don't even shop around to compare prices, then it's as simple as just putting something under there nose and chargin' them anything you want.

I don't want to see single issues go away. Lots of people don't. I think it's a weak argument that they are similar to newspaper in that you can just go online or watch tv for the news. Yah, but you rarely go back and reread or collect a newspaper. To attempt to do away with single issues is kind of a crime to me. I'm not that much of a collector any more, but there are so many readers who are. Disregarding that aspect, I just like to be able to grab a single issue and hold it. My eyes can't take a computer screen for the amount of time I might want to read a pile of comics. And I hate the idea of reading a comic on a small thing like an Iphone or whatever. I don't even have a cellphone dudes. I'm almost 27 and I feel like and old grouch. But seriously, someone tried to show me what that would be like and I hated it.

Then look at the economic situation. Here in Seattle, it's really really really starting to hurt. Just thinking about how many Microsoft employees are losing their jobs makes me nervous. Hell, bus fare went up this month and I'm seriously having to prioritize my budget due to that alone. That's like $15 a month minimum that now has to be pulled back from, guess what, probably comics. A hefty amount of customers are already trimming the fat from their subscriptions. But people want to buy comics. They want an escape. The industry needs to give them an excuse to do it. Oh hey, this book is only $2.50? Hell yeah, I can reason that over this $3.99 super glossy but supershort comic.

What I would like to see is someone in the industry really try to take advantage of this price swing. Find a way to cut your costs, and publish at only $2.50 or less. But it needs to be someone big. It can't just be like Radical or Boom!. And sorry IDW, unless you guys shape up you are going to be feeling the crunch. $3.99 across the board? Are you serious?

To make an actual impression and to create a trend, it has to be someone with a substantial presence. Dark Horse, Image, and DC are really the only companies I can see making this work. Top Cow gave it a try sorta by announcing it will not go past $2.99. And I'm sorry, I don't mean to come down on them, but really. You have Darkness and Witchblade. That is sadly not the chunk of the industry sales pie chart I am worrying about.

Take into account the current restrictions Diamond has placed on sales:
http://www.newsarama.com/comics/010919-Diamond-Thresholds.html
http://www.newsarama.com/comics/010921-Schanes-Diamond.html

Already, creators are feeling the crunch.
http://www.tcj.com/messboard/viewtopic.php?t=5829

Now take into account that actual competition is working on the distribution scene, slowly but it's there:
http://www.newsarama.com/comics/010926-Haven-Distribution.html

Now is the time. A publisher has to step up, and really push things in a new economic direction. It will be a risk. It will take time. But if nothing happens to change the current pace, I am really actually afraid for comics as a whole.

Then again, I'm just some guy managing a comic store. There's a whole crapload of stuff I most likely am not taking into account. And if anyone can pass along any info to educate me, that would be great. But from the ground level, it really feels like guerrilla warfare just to get comics into the hands of people who just want to enjoy them. Working behind enemy lines with little to no help here, guys. DON'T CUT OFF THE SUPPLY LINE.

It's not that hard, Marvel, really

So I'm going over the invoice for tomorrow's shipment of new comics. And I see that we are being given an amount of free overship copies of Dr. Doom & The Masters of Evil that is equal to our initial order. What this means is that we don't pay for them unless we can't sell them, if we can't then we just send this back. It seems fairly random as to what is chosen for this type of program sometimes.

You....you couldn't have done that to the Obama issue of Spider-Man? Really?

I mean, Dr. Doom & The Masters is
A) Going to be better that Amazing Spider-Man hands down
B) Something I'm gonna push hard in the store
and C) TOTALLY STARS DR. DOOM

But....realistically.....WHAT THE HELL DAMN GUY?!?!?

To be fair to Marvel

From Diamond Comics:

"In case you’ve been in a coma or hiding in a cave, this week’s long-anticipated release of Amazing Spider-Man #583 captivated consumers – selling through all versions of its first printing in record time "

I wonder....I wonder if this is because NOBODY HAD ANY. Bah. General feeling from other stores that I picked up on was that hey, economy sucks, we don't remember there being a back up story just a cover, so really we are sorry but c'mon. And I have to say we were in the same boat.

In the interest of fairness, this was the actual Diamond Daily notification:

"Retailers that exceed their orders for Amazing Spider-Man #575 that were placed by its FOC of October 9 with their orders for the regular Amazing Spider-Man #583 by its FOC of December 18 will qualify to order as many of the Obama Variant as they wish while supplies last.........Plus, if this main story weren’t enough of a draw, #583 will also feature a backup that sees Spider-Man meet President-Elect Obama. "

Diamond did give us a heads up. They did inform us of the back up story. It was only mentioned on the online update, so if you don't check that then it was easy to miss. I try my best, but dude. I manage a friggin' store. I got enough stuff to do. Did I screw up personally? Yeah. Sorry. But really, DC has a rep who calls me to let me know of important things. Dark Horse has a rep that does the same. It sure would be nice to have a little help from Marvel, considering retailer confidence is fairly low.

Both major companies have their problems when it comes to promotion and marketing. On the flip side of that if other comic book store managers are anything like me in their everyday experience then they are exausted, frustrated, and usually a little on edge. It's not ideal, but I believe that's what most managers are like for any type of retail. So this means that even if the retailer gets the word out, there is still room for human error. So what does this result in? For the publishers and retailers, a whole lot of missed opportunities. For the consumers? A lot of missed comics. And that just straight up sucks for everybody.

As a retailer, I have to say that the best company in the market right now that actually really tries to help retailers out would be Dark Horse. I have an assload of reasons, but here's a bunch in a nice easy list format:
-Weekly calls from a representative
-Accessible retailer website and weekly newsletters
-Pretty much all their HCs & TPBs are packed with protective slips between each volume to protect against scuffing damages, a very common problem that happens when items are shipped from Diamond.
-Say what you will about licenced properties, Star Wars, Aliens, Indian Jones, Buffy: they bring the customers in.
-Seriously, Buffy? Thank you. Perhaps the greatest new individual title to bring in new readers and new customers that continue to come back. I just signed up another new subscription customer last night just because of Buffy.
-And y'know, they publish the Goon.

And of the main two? Marvel or DC?
All I can say is that in the past year or two, Marvel has contributed the following to my downward spiral towards retail insanity:
-Death of Captain America
-Obama/Spidey
-Avengers Elektra/Skrull hype
-Dark Reign solicitations (or absence of any actual useful info)
-Brand New Day and the huuuuge sales drop off
-The endless amount of Wolverine one-shots
-To be fair, items that shipped late are returnable. But I sell out of Millar Wolverine, so it's moot. Spider-Man is always on time, damn them.....I mean, gratz! >_>

DC causes of insanity:
-Loss of sales from Countdown (note:certain copies were returnable)
-Loss of sales from Trinity (note: ditto)
-Good job having your core titles (Action, Batman) running late. BUT....we still sold fairly well
-Good job with the All-Stars always being late. BUT.....we sold virtually all of them regardless.
-RIP & Final Crisis, not really easy to get into. But......we still sell a crapload of them. And hey, last issue of Final Crisis was returnable because it was late......
-....I am actually trying to think of some, I am not just biased.

Bottom line. Retail stores need money to survive. Sucks but true. And if I had to weigh the the two out, Marvel has been the most detrimental. Now, you really do have to take regional differences into account though. I sell more Buffy and Green Lantern than I do X-Men. Anything Garth Ennis touches is always stronger than any 2nd tier DC title, and often times stronger than a core title. And I saw the report that basically every month Wonder Woman bleeds readers, but I order a steady quantity every month. And we are by no means a huge store. We don't have more than one location. But we have good traffic and a strong subscription customer base.

So yeah. That pretty much ends that rant. Marvel gave a heads up, and they don't deserve the level of finger pointing they are getting for this particular internet bitch fest. Well, they kinda do, but for other reasons. You get what I mean.

Huh, I ran the spell check and not a single mistake. Something....something is wrong.

Edit: As of this point, about 25 pre-orders on the 2nd print of Obama/Spidey. And I have explained the entire publishing scenario far too many times today.

Again with the Obama

I've taken about a dozen or so phone calls myself about Obama/Spidey this past week, but employee Jon said he had about 20-30 the past 2 days.

I can't really sum it up any better than Mike Sterling did here
http://www.progressiveruin.com/2009_01_11_archive.html#3385674185661034783

I will add that I took a phone call today from a woman asking about the variant cover. I told her we didn't qualify for it and started to explain the difference between the variant and the normal cover because hey, a lot of people don't know when they ask. She told me she knew, so cool I get to skip that whole part of the usual conversation. She then asked in an accusatory tone "So you guys been holding them for people ahead of time?"

Well.....that's what subscriptions are for. I mean, we are holding onto them in advance. But. Ah screw it >_<

And now I'll bet you we are the 'shifty' store.

I was actually thinking there would have been more requests because hey, Seattle. I'm glad though that I don't have to explain to tons of people why we won't have enough of the 1st printing.

Edit: Heh, Obamageddon
http://www.agreeablecomics.com/therack/?p=524

Jim, if you would please?

So, one of my favorite comics is the Thor Ragnarok story by Michael Avon Oeming & Andrea Divito. It's the perfect blend of the Kirby/Simonson history and the actual Norse mythology of the final days of Asgard. The story is epic practically on every page, and Divito's art is so friggin' epic it's beyond words at times. Unless the words are "OH SNAP". So I see in the order forms a new over sized HC will be available soon. Sweet! That can only be awesome on top of awesome! That's gonna.....look........wtf?

They merged it with the other Disassembled bullcrap?

"Collecting Thor issues #80 to 85, Iron Man #84 to 89, Captain America & The Falcon #5 to 7 and Captain America #29 to 32, written by Mike Avon Oeming, Mark Ricketts, John Jackson Miller, Robert Kirkman and Priest, pencilled By Andrea Divito, Tony Harris, Scott Kolins, Jorge Lucas, Scot Eaton and Joe Bennett features a cover by Steve Epting."

BAH!!!!!!!!

Ok, just a quick remembrance of all those other stories:

-The Iron Man was a waste of time

-The Captain America was Kirkman, which should make it better, but it was very forgettable.

-The Captain America & Falcon was, well, Captain America & Falcon. It wasn't bad, and I love Priest's writing, but I don't think there was a need to really, y'know, ever see this again.

And they want $50

Jim?

A SINGLE OVER SIZED HC FOR THE ONE GOOD STORY DURING THAT WHOLE DISASSEMBLED MESS. $24.99. IS THAT SO HARD?!?!!?!?

I shit you not, I could sell 20 copies easy right off the bat. A $50 book full of crap? Not so much.

Read this book or suffer my wrath

Last week we received a press packet from a new publisher that included a copy of their first major publication, the Charlatan: Preludes GN. The packet included a publishers note stating that the long term goal of this new venture was to create solid and fun sci-fi/superhero stories that could appeal to all ages of readers. Essentially, a PG-13 book that doesn't dumb things down but doesn't feature buckets of blood and gore. I love you Fear Agent, but damn, I ain't passing you along to a 10 year old. So to sum it up in a horribly simplistic way, Charlatan is to the sci-fi/superero genre as Bone is to the fantasy genre: a completely accessible, well done, and thoroughly enjoyable book that you can pass on to pretty much everyone.

I can appreciate this for a number of reasons. First off, someone has been needing to do this for a long long time. DC & Marvel have their all ages titles, but they don't really make it a point to push it on the larger markets. And even then, they follow a very episodic formula that almost reduces them in appeal (at least to older audiences I believe). Don't get me wrong, I still pretty much stand by what I always say and that this stuff is much better than like 90% of main stream titles. Tiny Titans and Marvel Adventures: Avengers are some of the best things being published today. But actually grabbing hold of new readers is tricky, and unfortunately from the trends I see at our store not too many teen boys are going to come in running for Tiny Titans. And not too many girls either because they just don't know it's out there.

But then you have something like Bone which fills a needed niche so perfectly. Accessible to readers regardless of age? Check. A solid fantasy epic? Check. Great story and art? Check. Stupid stupid rat creatures? Check. One of the best of the few actual fantasy titles available on the direct market? Check. And Bone is one of the most successful all ages titles available today.

So, it's about time someone tried to attempt something similar for the sci-fi/superhero set again.

Charlatan attempts to tackle this gap in the market by offering a new interesting story with a great singular purpose behind the entire publishing venture: lets have some fun and try to do a few new things with superheroes. And that's exactly what this first volume offers. Charlatan focuses on the story of Lucy Halford, who is the first human to ever be chosen as the defender of the universe. The problem is, she is 4 years old. Lucy's father steps up, refusing to surrender his daughter to the aliens who will train her for a life of hardship and an inevitable violent death. And as they are confronted with new and horrible threats, Lucy's father and mother have to ask themselves if they are willing to sacrifice the one thing in the universe that means the most of them in order to save the universe. Remember when Marvel comics consistently used to have a moral and ethical center to the conflicts?

Lawson's scripting is tight and he doesn't waste time nor does he throw too much at you all at once. He has a clear idea where he is going and builds a fun ride by introducing a number of sub-plots that will slowly pay off. Gouveia's art is clean and the man knows how to lay out a page. Something so many people out there don't know how to do (I'M LOOKING AT YOU, BENITIZ). He's not particularly flashy, but I don't think that's something I would have wanted to see. He does not detract from the story, he enhances it. I look forward to seeing him develop more and maybe refine his style, but as a draftsman I believe he's great. At no point did I have trouble trying to figure out what was going on (YOU'RE ON THE LIST BACHALO!).

So yeah. I want to support the hell out of this and I wish the best of luck to Jen & Gil Lawson, the husband and wife team opperating Generaljinjur. They have a a definite purpose to their publishing, and it's one I can get behind.

Now, see if you can find a way to fit in an ape and we are golden.

http://generaljinjur.com/

To that dude I hate: I HATE YOU

You just had to linger around and bug me over the course of nearly two hours while we processed our late shipment from last week because YOU HAD to have your copies of Brave & The Bold and Superman/Supergirl. AND THAT WAS ALL YOU BOUGHT.


MY HATRED FOR YOU BURNS LIKE A NUCLEAR HOLOCAUST

How much customer service is too much?

I was reading another blog where the writer was pointing out her annoyance at a comic store employee asking her if she needed help. And I am more inclined to side with the writer, mostly because the guy did sound kinda dumb. On the flip side of that, I wonder how often people take into consideration the fact that we are working a retail job and that more often than not the management/ownership wants the employees to ask people if they need help.

There are different degrees of this, to be sure. I always try to say hello right as soon a person comes in, and after a while ask if they need any help. Of course, a lot of the time I am straight up ignored when I say hello, so my inclination to ask if they need help is not so great. Sometimes, people just need to be left alone. Then you have the people who obviously need help because they keep putting stuff in the wrong place. But y'know, they don't think they need your help. Then you have people who can perfectly navigate the store or are just obviously browsing.

It is, however, our job to see if you need any help. So I am always interested to hear people complain about comic employees asking. I try to take into account some additional factors though. Honestly, sometimes comic employees do go a little gaga over female customers. A manager of mine from a while back would even go so far as to interrupt me if I was helping a cute girl and interject himself into the conversation. I understand that female customers may feel very apprehensive about the store employee trying to help them. I like to think I don't try this shit, but to be honest I would prefer to help a female customer over a fanboy who wants to complain about the Hulk movies or some shit. So hopefully that doesn't just come off as me wanting to only help cute girls, and more like a sane preference.

It always strikes me as just a poor choice to not have any female employees. Straight up, I believe it helps to create a better atmosphere and a more comfortable shopping experience for everyone. But the female employee needs to be prepared for the fanboy interaction. Cause the fact of the matter is the unwashed masses are going to notice her and are definitely going to behave differently.

But how much help is too much help? I try to only ever ask once, and then go back to work. But then I read reviews online that complain about the clerk not prying himself away from the counter. Was this me? Was this someone else? We have a staff of 6, so hell it could be anyone either being lazy or just taking a break. There is no way to tell exactly how people are going to perceive you and interact with you. I've had people wait at the register as I am filing books, and they never ask for help. Then they look pissed, and I just have to think "Look hey I'm the only one here, I'm doing multiple jobs at once, is it really that hard to just ask me for help?" Of course, I can't actually say that.

Then you have someone come in and compliment you for making the store a comfortable environment for them, like I did yesterday. And this person was someone I would not describe as a fanboy but just someone who greatly enjoy comics. So hey, we must be doing something right some of the time.

I pretty much find retail solace in the idea that you just ain't gonna make everybody happy, so you might as well just accept people having something negative to say and do your best to keep the happy ones happy.

And it will all be moot anyways once I finish construction on the mighty mecha-gorilla army.

I'm adding missile wrist launchers to their design, I think. Because that shit is tight.